Sometimes the caregiver is the bad guy
I think I annoyed my sister by pointing out that it would make more sense to go to the fair tomorrow than today. I had thought we had made arrangements last night to go tomorrow since my dad had an appointment today, but apparently I was wrong and we was supposed to go today. By the time I found out about going today it was after 11:30 a.m., so we would not have got out of here today before around 1 or 1:30 p.m. and my dad has a doctor appointment at 4:00 p.m. today. It is a hour drive from our house to Palmer (where the fair is), add in fair traffic and it would have been at least an hour and a half. So that means that we would have left here at say 1 p.m., got to the fair around 2 or 2:30 p.m. and had to be headed out from the fair back to my dad's doctor's office by 3:00 p.m.
That would leave only half an hour to an hour to get into the fair and see things and get back out. That's not very much time so we'd have been pushing my dad's wheel chair at top speed - which would have made his arm hurt where it bumped against the chair. Then he would still need to go to his doctor's office and we always have about a 2 hour wait to see her.
Not a good plan for the day, when I was thinking a few days ago that today would be an okay day to go I thought get to fair and go in by 10:00 a.m. and spend the morning and afternoon slowly exploring then go to doctor's appointment. So, this morning, when I found that I had misunderstood that the decision was last night, I made an executive decision based on being dad's primary caregiver and said we're not going today. We still have five days of the fair if he wants to go, it makes sense to me to let him relax and enjoy the visit rather than rush through things in an hour max. And he said it sounded like a better plan to him too.
I annoyed my sister with the change, but I am more worried about my dad's ability to hold up to the stress of all day in a car and wheelchair, then having to sit and wait for a doctor for hours, than I am with how my sister feels about how my schedule fits hers. Besides, when I told her I could not have him and me ready in time to go before noon at the earliest I heard no offers to come help with getting things ready, so I can hardly feel bad about not being able to make it today when I had thought we was going tomorrow anyway.
That would leave only half an hour to an hour to get into the fair and see things and get back out. That's not very much time so we'd have been pushing my dad's wheel chair at top speed - which would have made his arm hurt where it bumped against the chair. Then he would still need to go to his doctor's office and we always have about a 2 hour wait to see her.
Not a good plan for the day, when I was thinking a few days ago that today would be an okay day to go I thought get to fair and go in by 10:00 a.m. and spend the morning and afternoon slowly exploring then go to doctor's appointment. So, this morning, when I found that I had misunderstood that the decision was last night, I made an executive decision based on being dad's primary caregiver and said we're not going today. We still have five days of the fair if he wants to go, it makes sense to me to let him relax and enjoy the visit rather than rush through things in an hour max. And he said it sounded like a better plan to him too.
I annoyed my sister with the change, but I am more worried about my dad's ability to hold up to the stress of all day in a car and wheelchair, then having to sit and wait for a doctor for hours, than I am with how my sister feels about how my schedule fits hers. Besides, when I told her I could not have him and me ready in time to go before noon at the earliest I heard no offers to come help with getting things ready, so I can hardly feel bad about not being able to make it today when I had thought we was going tomorrow anyway.
posted by Sandra at 2:07 PM
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